I Am Bat Woman!!

Earlier this year before my BFF Tam decided to move in with my children and me, we would talk on the phone constantly and most always at bed time.  All I had was a cell phone and out here in the boonies (another name for country)  those things don't work too well.  Most of the time at my previous house I would have to sit on the front porch to have a phone conversation.  Let me add a little info.... I just purchased a cell phone booster and we can actually talk on the cell phones in parts of the house now!!  Anyway, back to my story Tam lived not too far down the road from me with her Dad and would ride her bike over on a regular basis (I'm talking bicycle.... not a cool scooter like we have now).  Don't ask why she didn't have a vehicle..... that's an entirely different story.   I've joked with her for a couple years now about looking like the witch from Wizard of Oz when she is peddling that bicycle (which is retired by the way).  That long black hair and her serious look when she is peddling just reminds me of the scene in Wizard of Oz. lol  So, back to my story..... we are talking and at the end of the conversation I tell Tam I'm about to go into my cave and go to sleep.  She tells me when I wake up the next morning to flash her the BAT SYMBOL and she will ride on over.  I laughed and said if I'm bat woman then she is cat woman!!

We hit the Limestone Flea Market that weekend and I'll be darned if I didn't see a belt buckle in pink with the batman symbol on it.  I immediately purchase it and while I'm putting on my new belt I spot a pink cat buckle.  I bought it for Tam and told her we are officially Bat woman and Cat woman!!  The remainder of our visit at the flea market I'm going squeak squeak and Tam is responding with meow!!  We haven't purchased our black jumpsuits yet, but we will real soon.

Quite frequently we go to WalMart in Alabama instead of TN just for a change of scenery.  If you start hearing squeaks and meows we are in the store.  Just follow the sound!!  Oh, every once in a while we forget our new names and do the hoot owl call (like Gomer Pyle in Andy Griffith), so if you hear crazy chicks hooting  like an owl in a store that's us too!!  We won't hurt you, I promise!!
 
If you do hear squeaking, meowing, or hoot owls in a store please don't report us to security because Target already has me on tape. A couple of years ago I was walking out the front door with my daughter and trying to open my umbrella at the same time... stepped a little too far to the right and caught my foot on the hand rail.  In order to keep from falling I guess I stepped over with my left foot and was somehow hovering over the rail while trying to get my daughters attention to help me.  All I could think about was falling the rest of the way and breaking my teeth.  Couldn't think straight enough to drop my purse and umbrella so I could grab the rail and steady myself.  My daughter was digging in her purse for the car keys and actually looked up and saw what was happening with me and quickly went back to digging in her purse.  I could have choked her for not helping me.  She said she was so horrified by the look of me "humping" the rail and the bystanders watching that she just couldn't acknowledge knowing me!!  Jeez, thanks fruit of my womb!!!!  When I finally steadied myself and got off the rail I had quite an audience.  I simply straightened my clothing (humping messes up your clothes), picked up my purse and umbrella, smiled and walked on to the car!!

It's a good thing I didn't have my Bat Woman status back then or it would have made the news headlines...... Bat Woman Humps Rail at Target.  That would have been embarrassing!!